Thursday, November 20, 2008

A completely self-serving whiny-ass post

Just to get it off my chest. Of course, i take another hiatus from posting, and then I have to come on here and dump all this crap off.

Okay, so my DarlingHusband has his oldest son, henceforth known as SmartAss. staying with us. SmartAss is working with Darling, trying to save up money, get a place of his own, and move his girlfriend (Henceforth known as MeanBitch) up here. But before I get onto the whiny-ass part, you need some background.

Darling had a screwed up childhood, and a mostly screwed up adulthood to be honest. So he has (or thinks he has) a lot to atone for. So he has this odd way of showing it to the people he harbors guilt over. SmartAss stayed with us for a year when he was 14-15. When he first moved in, it was Darling, myself, MiddleSon (who was 2 at the time) and SmartAss. And Darling was all "Son! Son! Sorry i was such a shit! Let me shower you with attention and money and show you how great I really am!" Fast forward about 5 months. Darling and I get custody of his other son, (who was about 3 at the time, and is now always referred to as my Oldest Son, since I have raised him.) And the processed repeated itself: "Son! Son!" So on and so forth. Fast forward about a year. SmartAss moves back with his mother, several states away, at the end of the school year. Darling's Brother moves in with us after being released from a vacation with the federal penal system. You know what's coming: "Brother! Brother!" Well, Brother ended up with us for a year and a half, and it went so seriously sour I can't even get into it here. Anyway, we had a peaceful for years, and added Youngest Son to our family. So you see, when Smart Ass moved in with us at the beginning of October, it started all over again.

Now I'll try to explain about SmartAss. He is almost 20. And he acts like it. Darling and I have gotten as far as we have by having a cordial, polite relationship. I know many couples who argue over petty things and call each other names and stuff, but Darling and I do not do that. We are not rude or sarcastic to each other. We actually like each other. SmartAss comes into the picture and starts getting lippy. Just the usual wise cracking smart ass comments that are not appreciated by the person who cleans the house, does all the laundry, cleaning, cooking, etc for three adults and three young boys. And I do not need Oldest Son and Middle Son hearing that crap either. In this house at least, respecting your mother still means something.

SmartAss is a new dad. My little step-grandson is about three weeks old at the time of this posting. His mother is MeanBitch, and she lives several states away from us. Mean Bitch also has 2 toddlers from a previous relationship. Needless to say, I do not want MeanBitch living up here. I have enough drama of my own, thank you very much. MeanBitch and Smartass have nightly 2 hour long phone conversations where they do nothing but yell and insult each other. MeanBitch keeps our phone lines buzzing all hours of the night and day.

Anyway, I have about had it. SmartAss is an eating machine. Food that was planned to last for 5 or 6 meals is getting eaten in 2. He s lazy and does nothing to help around the house. Case in point: a few weeks ago, I was sick. Not just sick....but sick! I had a horrible flu and pink eye in both eyes. I was lying on the couch, trying to ignore everybody and everything. SmartAss and Darling come home from work and proceed to shower and eat dinner that I had ready for them. Neither SmartAss nor Darling have a lot of work clothes, so i had been doing a load of laundry nightly. earlier this day, I had done a load of the other kids' clothes, and they were still in the washer. SmartAss yells from the laundry room that he "can't put his stuff in because there is stuff already in it". So I drag my ass off the couch and switch loads. Now seriously, how hard would it have been for a healthy hardy young man to take wet clothes from the washer and place them in the dryer?! Apparently, it was just too damn hard. So is doing dishes, even ones he creates all for himself that were not part of a meal I cooked. And picking up after himself. Or making his bed. Or putting his clean folded laundry away after I finish with it. Or picking up a few groceries at the store to replace the ones he uses. The kid ate 4 packages of ramen noodles in one sitting at lunch, and then packed away 4 pork chops, rice and corn for dinner. (He skipped the beans - the one thing I make that he won't touch) Hot dogs and mac n cheese? I can no longer cook 10 hot dogs and one box of mac. I know have to make at least 16-18 hot dogs and no less than three boxes of mac. 4 bowls of cereal for breakfast, 4 grilled cheese sandwiches as a 'snack' after dinner. You get the idea.

And of course, SmartAss is making plenty of money working for Darling. He sends a good chunk of it down to MeanBitch. The rest he spends on fast food (which Darling and i do not buy on principal), bowling, junk food, etc.

And if MeanBitch does move up here - we have another problem. This woman (though i hesitate to call her that) has no idea how to live on her own. She never has. She has no way to set up a home for herself and her children. (She is 21, by the way) I asked SmartAss what kind of furniture and stuff they had that would need to be moved up here. Nothing. A few old mattresses for the kids, and some toys. Oh wait! Not quite 'nothing' he adds. The kids each have one of those $400 Power Wheels ride-on toys, and they have two computers and a big screen TV. But no couches or tables or chairs or dishes or pots and pans or curtains or a microwave or any appliances or towels or anything else you need. Sorry, you do not "need" a big screen TV. You do "need" a refrigerator. Darling and I do not have the money to help them get set up. (Well, we sort of do, but with Christmas and two kids birthdays coming up, not to mention bills) We have been trying to clean out and declutter ourselves, and have sold or given away almost all of our extra household crap. Also, I do not particularly want to help SmartAss and MeanBitch.

And with SmartAss and MeanBitch, I also would get the drama of CrazyDrunk, who is SmartAss's biological mom, who lives in his home state. All these years, I have been so thankful that CrazyDrunk lives so far away. But now her "only grandbaby" would be moving up here. And with them would be ThugChick, SmartAss's juvenile delinquent and high-school dropout little sister who enjoys spending her days sleeping around and beating up her current boyfriend's mom. No, I am not making this up.

I have had enough........